The Power of God's Word

Yesterday morning I awoke to Jord giving me a quick kiss goodbye.  My mind was confused, "I need to get up and do something, but I can't remember what it is!" Jord's calming words, "Just rest." and then he was out the door to work.  I couldn't go back to sleep so got up and was disoriented and very easily distracted.  So much so that I didn't do one of my morning inhalers, by one had only eaten a piece of toast, had called Jordan multiple times, cried on Wyatt (one of our roommates) several times when he asked me simple questions (thankfully Jord had warned him I'm not quite myself these days!), was continuing to run low grade fevers and my mind was whirling NTM, lung transplant, pancreatitis, gallstones, thyroid out of wack, need to make this appointment, oh wait, I never did my treatments and forgot to take my vitamins, called Jord again, "I'm on overload I can't take anymore questions."  "What should I do? email the elders?" "Yes."  In not taking my thoughts captive, (had started my devotions and didn't get past two verses before being distracted by something else), panic had set in and I was alone in the house, my husband has just started a new job so he is not as available, it has been almost a month since I "hit the wall" and started spiraling downhill, just got back from a grueling quick trip to NC where I got information overload and now trying to process and my processor is not processing anything logically.  Emailed elders, then texted Eric, then my brain went to Jordan telling me in the past to call/text ladies to pray for me and a mass plea for help went out to the first group of ladies from church I could think of.  Jamie called and in a very calm voice, even though she was driving to a doctor appt of her own she calmed me down, prayed with and for me, and then called back to check on me later.  People started checking in on me and texting me verses and I started to think a little more rationally.

Women, I'm sure you can all relate in some form or another to the above.  Men, there is an inside peek into our brains and how quickly we can let our emotions take control and rule us.  Eric came over last night and got the whole picture as best as we could give it to him and prayed with us and gave us truths from His word.

This morning, I woke up while Jordan was still here and we had time to talk before our day started.  He helped me shower (still get a little light headed so I'm not doing that by myself yet!) and let me tell you...I don't know what it is about showers when you are sick, but they just make you feel SO much better...I have a whole list of "comfort" things when I'm sick...see Snuffy and Safari below: :)

My Mom bought me Snuffy when I was 2 and had my second surgery...I can still see her big smile coming into the recovery room with him in her arms.  That was 26 years ago.  Snuffy has been at every surgery since...and he still plays the Sesame Street Song! He's been the "doctor" complete with mask and hat when I woke up, he's had matching bandages like me and lots of other fun stuff over the years from my nurses and docs that try to make the hospital as much fun as possible.  :)  To the nurses out there: you have the opportunity to make or break a patient's stay and I'm so thankful for all the incredible nurses God has placed in my path.  Funny side note: my nurse Shirley was here changing my PICC line bandage yesterday and she said someone had sent her a comic: "Be nice to your nurse...they keep the doctor's from killing you."  :)  Anyway, back on track (see that easily distracted thing...) :)

So comfort things when I'm sick: my hubby, family, friends...I really hate being alone when I'm sick, but God is growing me in that one and reminding me that He never leaves me.  :)  Stuffed animals, books, IPOD with sermons and worship music etc.  This morning I was careful to write everything down as I thought of it, set alarms on my phone for the meds/vitamins etc, and spent undistracted time in His Word and "came across" this verse in my reading time:

1 Corinthians 2:5 "that your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God."

I realized right then and there, that yesterday my brain was thinking about all the new things that could be wrong with me (or are and need to be fixed), am still running low grade fevers even though I'm on IV antibiotics, still not feeling better, etc.  Was stressed about having to figure everything out so that I would be ok and forgot to shepherd my heart towards the One Who has EVERYTHING under control....see previous post "The Control Issue"...maybe I should read it again LOL.  :) Anyway, God graciously reminded me that even though NTM is a bad bug or I might have pancreatitis or my gallbladder might have issues, or my thyroid is out of wack, He is more powerful than ALL of that....all we have to do is look around at the amazing universe He created!  NTM might be a bad bug, but it's just a bug and so incredibly small in comparison with God's awesome and majestic power...after reading those verses I listened to a couple of Sovereign Grace Worship Songs...As Long as You are Glorified and You Are Our Hope.  I was sitting here doing my chest percussion vest, with my IPOD earbuds in, eyes closed, and arms raised worshipping the One who never fails me even when I forget His promises...He paid for that forgetfulness with His life on the cross...astounding when you really stop and think about it!  

Thank You Jesus that you are raised and reigning and on Your glorious throne above!!!   

I need to be a good patient and get doctors stuff ready for my appointment at noon today.  Thanks for praying!! 

In His Mighty Grip,
Rachelle :)