One Appointment Down Three to Go...This Week :)

"How are you?"  A question we all ask, probably every single day.  My response to that question right now: "Which body system, how much do you want to know, and how much time do you have??" I haven't been keeping up with updating the blog (sorry for those of you that can be blog junkies like me!) because I've got a lot going on as far as appointments, follow ups, orchestrating doctors/tests etc, and simply trying to do all I can do on a daily basis to help me be as "healthy" as I can be.  Food is really limited for me because it seems like everything makes me sick right now so trying to determine what sounds good and will help instead of hurt my tummy can be a challenge! Then trying to explain to my sweet hubby what the package that I want looks like and where it is and only buy that brand if it's on sale etc, turning errands over to him, and generally taking things off of my plate and adding to his "honey do list" minute by minute.  And learning that it really IS ok if the laundry sits in laundry baskets for days on end and never makes it to the closet before it gets worn again.  Driving is also limited between severe abdominal pains that only go away if I lay down, dizziness, nauseousness (and if I get into a coughing fit it's all over!), recovering from the fall on my left side and generally feeling physically miserable all the time.  Sometimes it's minute by minute so it's hard to know if I'll be OK to make a quick trip to the store or if I should ask Jordan or a friend from church for help or if whatever the "need" is can wait.  And I'm still learning the meaning of a "quick" trip to the store--it's just ENTIRELY against my nature to be in a grocery store and walk by things I know we will need soon and not get them.  Jordan gently reminded me when I called him from Fry's the other day saying, "Honey, I know I was only supposed to get eggs, but you need bagels, and in walking to the back of the store where the eggs are 'conveniently' located, I saw raspberries on sale, then I checked out the naturals section and they had some rice mixes that sound really good right now, and I got paper towels and paper plates..." to which he replied, "Uh, you are not supposed to be out shopping around right now!  You were supposed to go to the bank and CVS and head home."  Right.  Check.  I did it.  Again.  Realization sinks in hard as exhaustion sets in and I still have to get all this out of the truck when I get home and get the cold stuff in the fridge.  These are the moments I really get how well Jordan knows me and that he sets boundaries to help protect me from myself.  And in those moments I'm incredibly grateful for the husband God has blessed me with!!  :) 

Appointments.  My PCD pals, and many others can relate to weeks filled with appointments.  Not being able to drive puts an interesting twist on getting there and I have grown in entirely new ways in trusting God.  It definitely demands some creativity and orchestration.  This week I have four appointments, one of which is in Tucson.  Jordan drove me to his parent's house Sunday after church so his Mom could take me for my monthly ENT check up this morning.  I have a sinus infection--was not surprised by this because I haven't been doing the sinus rinse as diligently because it makes me gag and when I'm already nauseous that generally ends in throwing up for me so I have avoided them like the plague.  With all the other complex things my body is doing right now that we haven't been able to sort through, he wants me to do 3 sinus rinses a day instead of put me on antibiotics.  I have to do it at this point because typically once my sinuses give way to infection my lungs are not far behind.  

  My next appointment is the Endocrinoligist Wednesday morning.  Finally!  We have been waiting all summer for this one!  Having never been down this road, I'm not sure what to expect, but I'm thankful to finally be getting in to see him.  Jordan's parents are taking me to this one to help "wade through" information overload that always happens with a new doctor and what tests etc.
  I got some "helpful hints" from my ENT in how to communicate to a new doctor and express urgency/concern, but without "dumping" everything in on a first visit.  Pray that God will give him wisdom with what tests to order, that they would happen in a timely fashion, and that we could figure this one out sooner rather than later so Jordan can have some of his sanity back.  ;)  A super emotional "off" wife is not exactly what you dream up when you get married, but life happens and God's grace continues to be sufficient for each day!       

Thursday is a "two for one" kind of day.  I have the hidascan in the morning to test the gallbladder function and my Naturopath in the evening.  Pray for peace for the morning...I'm nervous about this test because it is going to "stress" the gallbladder out and a couple of my docs agree that a lot of my symptoms point to gallbladder so a test that can exacerbate symptoms that are already miserable is just not something I'm looking forward to.  I know God will carry me through and it may not be as bad as I'm imagining but in the mean time, by His grace I am taking thoughts captive, listening to sermons, and focusing on other things--like being spoiled at the "Thomas Resort".  Mom and Dad T. recently moved to a retirement type community that has "all the trimmings" so to speak.  :)  And of course we went shopping before my appointment today.  I also got to see my Grandma for a couple hours this evening which was a super special treat.  She is my Grandma that was married to my Papa that died when I was 15 and we are still super close.  :)

It's now been 84 days since I got sick this time around.  I look back and an entire summer turned out WAY different than I envisioned and we are pretty much into the fall.  Kids are back in school and new routines are being established and back in June and July I kept talking about "when I get better" envisioning that I'd be back to "normal" by the fall for sure.  As always, God has a way of sanctifying us that we don't always like.  Although there are times when I "kick at the goads" so to speak, by His grace and through His Spirit, I am growing in trusting Him even more and I am so much closer to Him now than I was back in June.  Jordan has grown tremendously and so have people all around me.  It's so neat to see God provide for all the little details to come together at just the right time for just the right person to drive me to an appointment or bring me a meal, send me a text, or call me or stop by right when I needed it the most.  I am much more limited than I would like to be right now, but in that limitation I am reminded that I am dependent.  Dependent on the One who made me--we all are--and yet we go through seasons where we forget.  In our pride we believe "Oh I've got this.  Ears, lungs, sinuses...I can suffer well for the glory of God."  When I write those words it displays the ugliness of my own heart.  In His gracious plan, God chose to humble me--in this season He chose to "throw in" lots of other organs and systems that just don't want to work correctly right now.  I joked with the MA who checked me in and took my temperature today--"Yay!  My temp is back to baseline--between that and my heart, I have two things that are at baseline for me!."  As I was reminded by our worship leader, Josh Kellso on Sunday before we sang the song, Jesus, I my Cross Have Taken, as children of God, we truly have no reason to complain--Jesus bore God's wrath on the cross for my sins and there is a DAY coming that will be glorious beyond belief, and this weak frail body will be transformed as I meet my Savior face to face...when I am finally and truly HOME. 

Resting in His Everlasting Arms,
Rachelle :)  

Our "evening out" from several weeks ago

 that turned into going to Meri and Seth's condo 

instead of Fleming's. We still had fun even though I 

was in pain!